the lady doth protest too much, methinks

So yeah, here i am writing, again....but on the plus side i did manage to finish my Shakespeare homework on "Hamlet" without actually reading the play. God, i'm an english major, i should be loving this stuff and quoting Shakespeare left and right, shouldn't i? Its rather alarming the amount of stuff I read that i really really don't like. I know that the secret to becoming a good writer is to read as much as possible, and I'm really trying to write, but afraid that everything is sounding like some stupid teenage angsty crap which is really not what i'm going for at all. Not that i have angst, but i surely can remember what it was like. There I go, feeling old again. Sometimes it's just so depressing to read books, because i am so amazed by what i'm reading that i don't think that i could possibly ever write something that would ever get published. But a girl can dream... Really looking forward to my Atwood/Weldon class next semester as margaret atwood is amazing, if i could have a tenth of her talent i think i'd be happy. i swear i feel like all the books on the shelf are just mocking me sometimes. and yes, i'm aware of how crazy that sounds, and it is. but seriously though, it's so frustrating to read a book that is such complete garbage that it's laughable, but at the same time i'm thinking why didn't i think of that? i laugh at the stupid chick lit books with the silly pink covers and hapless single women in london with their shitty jobs and unstable relationships, but yet i try to write and all that comes out is angry stuff about my past. Which could be good, if i'm going for the david sedaris approach, which is basically to make fun of my family so much that its considered brilliant. Started writing a story in shakespeare class the other day, about this thirtysomething guy who's this complete asshole and uses women as he pleases, thanks for the inspiration, mike. but i think it might be a little too "American Psycho"-ish, but we'll see. So....off to do who knows what, maybe work on my paper a little bit before bed, or just sit and brood over my recent drunken phone call recieved from a certain thirtysomething ex-boyfriend. why am i the drunken phone call girl, thats all i want to know. should i be flattered? it happens at kind of an alarming rate, and i'm talking about several people here. i don't get it, i'm mean to drunk people, and yet they still call me. well enough of this, the night is young...

so somehow my life has spiraled into some bizarre "When Harry Met Sally" type of thing where I am convinced that billy crystal had it right when he said men and women can never be friends. I have confirmation from Liz that this is true, and that said, it's a shame. So I'm sitting here in bed listening to rufus wainwright, disgustingly full from going to Margaritas and then baskin robbins for pumpkin ice cream, the most amazing thing in the world. I actually managed to get out of bed in time for italian today, and was feeling rather proud of myself until I looked at my phone as I was getting off the bus and realized that I was an hour early to class. god I scare myself sometimes. So I have homework to do, which basically means I'm going to mope around the house for a while until I'm too tired to actually do anything, then promise myself I'll do it in the morning, which, of course, I won't. I have, however, only missed 2 classes this week, don't laugh, this is quite an accomplishment. Ran into B. at the library and it appears that mr. coke-head party animal of the summer has now turned into an obsessive-compulsive studier and that's kind of scary. Especially coming from someone pronounces library "libary". Just kind of want to crawl under the covers and not come out for a while...I'm tired....

help

Well, as usual class was a waste of my time. I just spent 20 minutes sitting in the car talking to my father, and apparently, i'm getting a new car- a jetta. Calm down, not one of those cool new ones, but a 1998, which, for those of you who remember, is pretty much the same as "the white jetta". oh man, those were the days. Now it's time to eat something, since liz is gone till tomorrow i'm stuck fending for myself and reminding myself that mayonnaise from a jar and dominos double melt pizza does NOT constitute a balanced meal. damn. And yes, Jesse, i have joined you and given into my nerdy writing tendencies..hopefully this will provide some sort of way for me to actually write something worth reading insead of recounting my horrible eating habits, but we have to start somewhere i suppose. it's a sad day for me, the jets lost yesterday and now apparently chad pennington is out for 2-4 weeks because of a shoulder injury. all i know is that i'm going to the game on 12/5 and i expect him to be in top form. Oh, and for anyone who is reading this, i got a call from my ex-boyfriend, Scott, saying that his girlfriend had informed him that he had shouted out my name three times in his sleep the other night. I gather she was sort of pissed. And now he is supposedly coming up to visit this week. Is this a good thing? I don't know....meanwhile i am involved in a non-relationship, that being two emotionally fucked up people who don't know what they want and think that anything that progresses beyond hand-holding is a sign of commitment and so....no hot sex stories to tell here :(

god bless america!  

Procrastination

So here you have it. Sadly, I have broken down and decided that my thoughts are just so damn important that they should be available for all to read. Just to get this out of the way, I apologize, because sadly, they are not. So....it's Monday, everyone's favorite day, and I'm supposed to be reading The Scarlet Letter but instead have taken the UConn approach to studying and headed over to sparknotes.com where I proceeded to get nice little chapter by chapter summaries. According to my teacher, however, sparknotes is run by people who need money for drugs and so I could be reading a pile of crap and not even know it. Anyhow, it's quite handy. What ever happened to cliffs notes by the way? I think i still have some from high school, those black and yellow covers. Apparently, Barnes and Noble now owns sparknotes which makes no sense to me, but who's going to mess with B&N?
I had this horrible thought yesterday when i remembered my mother telling me that something like 80 percent of married couples met in college. So that gives me about 2 more semesters to meet Mr. Right or else I'm fucked. Or not. I have this scary suspicion that i'm turning into one of those antisocial people that hangs out watching A Cinderella Story on Friday nights with the cat. I think i have a problem, that being that i'm not even 21 yet and i really despise drinking. I'm not talking about going out to dinner, drinking a bottle of wine so my face turns bright red drinking, but the UConn system of drinking. Since when did Keystone become this school's official beer anyway. I guess I'm a beer snob, but isn't it a little suspicious when one can purchase a 30 of Keystone for roughly the same price as a six pack of Sam Adams Light? But seriously, every time I drink up here I inevitably end up sleeping on the bathroom floor, or, on occasion, in the shower, water optional. Or maybe it's just me. Well, I'm off to American Lit where my professor looks like a lumberjack and swears like a sailor. God, does anyone even say that anymore? I think I'm getting old....